I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
