We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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