Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
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