we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
she smelled like a LAN party
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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