Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
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