So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
