I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
