"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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