She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
