found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
3pm strippers are depressing
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
