Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
