Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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