false alarm. still invincible.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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