oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.