oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
