You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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