**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
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I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
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Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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