I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Randomize