Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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