i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
