Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize