sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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