shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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