Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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