I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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