Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
Randomize