i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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