from now on my penis is your penis
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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