i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize