He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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