So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
