Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
well you can't waste a boner
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize