i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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