Fuck appropriateness.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Randomize
