ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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