My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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