She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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