I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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