IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
