You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
