I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize