your room smells of hookers.
And success
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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