Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
