i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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