Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
God, I missed his penis.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
