The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
