I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
