eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize