no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize