my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
