Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
