Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
The air was thick with penises
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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