How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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